Decreased social pressure to get married has led people to make better and more informed choices about their future life partners. They discuss important issues long before they get married, share a vision for the future and make sure they are aligned with each other. I hope you will be a happy couple. Sadly, I still often see people unhappy with their relationships after they have decided to break them off for various reasons after getting married. While some divorces can be civil with shared property and, more importantly, an equal share of custody schedules, others are concluded after the fact and are more It can prolong dramatically.
The latter was the case of Reddit user u/Small-Fondant-1273, who questioned whether he was an idiot for refusing to help his ex-wife financially after their marriage disintegrated. I’m asking how
More information: reddit
The puzzle of whether to support your ex-spouse during difficult times is a difficult question for most people to answer.
Image credit: Emma Bauso (not actual photo)
A Redditor asked for his opinion on the dilemma he faced: whether he should support his ex-wife financially even if she married him only for the money.
Image credit: Small fondant 1273
After the divorce, my ex-wife’s situation improved, but it got worse, and my child and one of my husbands became seriously ill.
Image credit: Small fondant 1273
For refusing to help his ex and just taking care of his family, OP is beaten by his former partner and her new husband.
Image credit: Small fondant 1273
The poster states that he believes he has the right to refuse help, but that his sons may feel differently.
The original poster (OP) is a divorced father of two boys aged 14 and 16. All the while, he worked to support his then-wife in his education so that she could get a higher paying position. When she achieved her goal, she blatantly told the OP that she was never interested in saving her marriage and was only using him.
After the divorce proceedings, custody of the children was split 50/50 and the ex-wife had to pay child support as she earned much more than she did thanks to her education and career change. . A year after her divorce, she remarried and had more children.
After the birth of her last child four years ago, her fortunes changed. Various hardships have piled up on her family, with her husband getting cancer, one of her children diagnosed with a long-term medical condition, and her position impacted by her Covid-19 pandemic. rice field. Following this, his sons stated that it was difficult for them to live with his mother and that they wanted to spend more time with the OP, which prompted the poster to go to court and increase custody. This means that the child support he received from his ex-wife has also decreased.
Her financial troubles didn’t end there as she had to move into a smaller house with her family and also wanted to stop paying child support. She then contacted her OP and asked him to help take care of her family, his boy’s family.
Afterwards, the conversation with his ex heated up as he brought up how she used him in the past. Therefore, he owed her nothing. His ex-wife then called him a selfish jerk, and she said her family lives off of charity. As this failed to move OP, she told him that she hoped she had cheated on him during her marriage and that spending his money wasn’t enough.
His ex-wife’s new husband then texted the poster, calling his name, reluctant that his sons might start to hate him once they realized he had tormented them. seriously threatened.
Image credit: Karolina Grabowska (not actual photo)
After his story, some Redditors began to suspect the OP, considering he was unfaithful or abusive to his wife. He said he put a lot of effort into maintaining the relationship.
People further suggested that the OP should only contact his wife by text and document everything.
of Rosen Law Officewho specializes in divorce cases, suggests that an important part of post-divorce relationships is setting boundaries with an ex. Boundaries are important not only for the feelings and comfort of the divorcee, but also for the children in the relationship. Unfortunately, in this case, rather than the adults discussing the issue and thinking about what is best for the child, the children seem to be telling their father that they want to live with him because his mother is having difficulties. is.
This post has received over 14,000 upvotes and over 2,300 comments since it was posted two months ago. The community decided he wasn’t a jerk in this situation and most commenters said the OP was right in his actions. Some even talked about the difficult divorce, saying he acted the same as the poster.What’s your opinion? How do you think you would have acted in this situation, or do you have a similar experience you can share with us in the comments?
A commenter agreed with the OP and said he would have done the same in his position
Image credit: UnorthodoxY (not actual photo)